Women trapped with abusers because of cost of living crisis

The cost of living crisis is forcing victims of domestic abuse to remain with their abusers, charities have warned, while refuges are struggling to stay open amid spiralling energy bills.

Across England and Wales, more than two million people experience domestic abuse each year. Now a Women's Aid survey of victims found that, in two thirds of cases, abusers are using the cost of living crisis and concerns about financial hardship as a tool of coercive control, including to justify further restricting access to money. 

One survivor said: “I feel like my only option to keep my kids is to go back to my marital home, where he nearly killed me.”

Lizzy Dobres, policy and practice manager for Women’s Aid, told the Telegraph that the cost of living crisis is having a “devastating impact on survivors of domestic abuse”. 

“It’s heartbreaking,” she said. “If women can’t afford to heat their own homes, how can they leave with their children?”

Ms Dobres added that women’s refuges have not received the energy rebate, and many of these centres – which can be lifesaving for those fleeing violence – cannot afford spiralling energy bills. 

“We’re getting emails from centres who can’t afford the energy bills,” she said. “One service said last week they had to provide a wellbeing table of food for the staff, it’s beyond belief.”

The research also found that 73 per cent of victims said they are scared to leave their abusive home because of fears over finance.

Ruth Davison, the chief executive officer at Refuge, the largest specialist domestic abuse organisation in the UK, said that the degree to which frontline staff are hearing women are balancing the danger of living with their perpetrator and the struggle of managing alone is “staggering”.

Deanna*, a survivor of domestic abuse that lasted three years, spoke to The Telegraph about the impact economic abuse had on her.

Deanna said she had a very privileged upbringing, with a close support network of family and friends. She attended good schools and studied at Manchester University. Shortly after graduating, she met her now ex-partner, who was working in London.

Her abuser tore at her close relationships, cutting her off from her family and making her delete all men – including her brother and father – from her phone. He then quit his job and forced Deanna to fully fund their lives.

“Because of money we had to move gradually further and further out of London [and away from her family], I was paying for both of our lives, bills, food. I sold all my belongings, gifts from my 18th birthday, and DVDs to sell food. We had no electricity, no hot water,” she said. “I didn’t see friends or family at all. It was a very lonely and solitary life.” 

Deanna’s abuser demanded access to her cards and forced her to be a guarantor on his payday loans, putting her in thousands of pounds of debt. 

“He made me be a guarantor [for payday loans], knowing he would never repay it,” she said. “There’s very little safeguarding women financially.”

Refuge said that 92 per cent of its frontline workers reported that the cost of living crisis is pushing survivors into debt or further into debt.

Deanna said she was not allowed to ask her abuser about his own financial situation, and that any manner of question could provoke a rage. 

“I woke up every day terrified, and terrified not knowing what to expect that day, not knowing what version of him I was going to get,” she said.

“[The violence] started with a push, a shove, hands around my throat. He drew blood on my neck where had his nails in my throat. That first instance I locked myself in the bathroom and slept on the bathroom floor. It got worse and worse. The worst act of violence left me with permanent nerve damage.”

Deanna said that the economic abuse was the most debilitating part of their relationship.

“The physical violence was the least worst of everything. What he did to me psychologically and emotionally was crippling,” she said. “Money was the most debilitating thing in that whole situation.” 

Expressing fears about how the cost of living crisis could impact other women in her position, Deanna said: “The cost of living crisis is utterly fatal.” 

Women’s Aid is calling on the government for an emergency domestic abuse fund to help survivors pay for essential items and energy bills.

Refuge said it supports the call for an emergency fund to be put in place for survivors of domestic abuse, and for the £20 Universal Credit uplift to be reintroduced for all claimants.

Ms Dobres cautioned that the survey was conducted shortly before the recent increased energy cap – which could see the average household paying £3,549 annually. “We’re very worried about what this means going into winter,” she said. 

*Deanna’s name has been changed for her safety